Hey, so I was chatting to a couple after work yesterday about life and told them that I might look pretty clean cut and professional when I'm at work but I actually came from a very broken home and a pretty rough background. My parents divorced when I was 4 and my Dad moved out and never came back. For those of you who have had a Mum and Dad at home you're very blessed and most likely wouldn't know what I'm talking about but trust me when I say it leaves a pretty darn big gaping hole in you. It affected me in several ways, mainly self esteem, confidence, loneliness and all the sort of horrible things that go with that sort of environment. I'll say first hand of an absolute truth that it's not the best way for kids to grow up. For me, I developed some pretty nasty addictions from about a 10 year old that stuck with me for many, many years. Most self harm related but they were the type of thing I did my best to hide from others. An invisible prison that I had no way to escape from - and to make it worse, no one even knew. It took many, many years before I found my freedom through Jesus.
He broke every single prison and set me free making me the person I am today. Sadly things affected one of my family members much, much worse. While they were young and in a moment of weakness and extreme pain they were offered and dabbled first with smoking weed, then shortly after it led to stronger things like speed and then just about every hard drug they could get their hands on. After developing such a strong addiction to these dangerous and illicit substances they soon found out that normal employment just didn't make the sort of money you needed to meet the demand your body now craved and so they entered the world of crime and distribution. It's the natural process in the drug world. Supply and demand. The demand dictates the need for supply. As you can imagine, this wreaked havoc on my family forcing me to have to move out for my own safety and because home no longer became a place I wanted to be. I saw attempted suicides right in front of my face with knives cutting wrists right down to the tendons and blood spurting out everywhere. I also saw them jump in front of a full speed moving truck and bounce off the headlights only to get back up and just walk away.
I'll say this of an absolute truth - you don't check out of this place until God says so. Trust me, I even saw them ride a motorbike into a solid brick wall at over 100km/h rupturing the petrol tank with their knee again to just walk away. Things didn't end there though. After some very poor choices the law got involved which ended up with court cases, family members pitched against one another and eventually jail time. You've probably seen those movies where someone talks to a loved one in solitary confinement on a phone with the bullet proof glass window in between. Well, I've been there. That was me on my lunch break from work. Here's where it got interesting. This family member met someone in jail - no one in particular - but just an old guy that said something like "don't end up like me...". Somehow something about this stuck and they decided enough was enough. They decided it was time to break out of that world and start over. So they did. I believe 100% it was God intervening because of His love. He can use very interesting and unexpected ways to reach us.
I've seen His hand move in ways that completely defy description. What followed next was a complete turn around. When they were released from prison they got a job and worked hard. Really hard in fact for many, many years. They cut all ties with the world they previously knew and started over. Fast forward to today and they're happily married living an entirely different life and I have to say that I couldn't be more proud of them and to be known as their brother. Why am I saying all this? Because if you met this person now you would have no idea of their past. Through God's immense grace and mercy they got given a second chance and the opportunity to change for the better and they took it with both hands. Everyone has a story. Everyone has a background and it's probably not going to be something you're gonna find out in the first two or three times you meet someone. That girl that's really shy or dresses really different and pretty out there may be doing it for a reason. She might have had things happen to her when she was young that never should have happened.
That guy that seems really scary and dangerous with all the tats and piercing's might be that way because he never got valued or ever encouraged or loved when he was growing up. Everyone has a story. Jesus never called us to judge others. In fact, its absurd to do so unless you have the ability to know their entire past and have felt everything they did and went through. In all honesty, we just don't have the eyes for it. What Jesus does call us to be is discerning. Don't be a fool and just accept everything you get put in front of you. Test things, check things, avoid things if necessary. Save yourself the pain and destruction that I spoke of above. When it comes to people though, don't use that discernment to pick holes in peoples character or expose their weaknesses to others - instead use discernment to reveal their weaknesses then respond in love. I've seen that very often love isn't about what you do, but what you don't do. Love doesn't fight back when it's provoked because through discernment and wisdom it sees the reason the person is lashing out. Love walks hand in hand with wisdom and allows us to understand the "why behind the what".
Love sees past the insults, the attacks, the hate and sees a hurting person that needs help. I believe there are two types of people in this world... broken ones that want help and broken ones that don't want help. We are all broken whether we like to admit it or not. Our job as believers in Jesus isn't to ram "The Truth" down peoples throats and make them choke on their guilt and shame. Never once does the Bible tell us to remove choice from others - in fact the Bible promotes choice with so many statements of "if" and "choose" all through it. Removing choice is manipulation which is a direct form a witchcraft which only comes from our enemy the Devil. Instead our job is to be a light to the darkness, hope to the hopeless, love to the hate-filled, happiness when there is only misery and truth to deception. Were to have a heart ready to help in love to anyone who wants it. The best way you can show God to anyone is incredibly simple. Be love. The Bible says clearly in 1 Corinthians 16:14 that we should "Do everything in love" for a good reason. God is love so it only makes sense hey.
And if you don't know what real love looks like, I'll tell you. It looks exactly like the perfect sinless Son of God choosing willingly to die in our place for all the horrible sins of the world making a way for us to get back into relationship with God The Father in Heaven. Everyone has a story. Everyone has scars. Sometimes they're still open wounds so today don't be salt in their wounds but instead be the salt on a hot meal to a love starved world. God loves you.